Have you seen the adult movies where the woman spreads her cheeks and the guy with the humongous penis just shoves it in her anus and starts banging away mercilessly? You can be sure that if the woman isn’t spaced out on drugs – and that’s a rarity in the modern world of porn – then there has been some preparation beforehand. You just don’t get to see it in the movie because it would (i) ruin the continuity and (ii) be quite boring.
In the world of Hollywood porn, the stunningly beautiful “actresses” usually have enemas prior to getting butt-loved within an inch of their lives.
But you aren’t a porn star (even if you wish you were). So, how do we get our women to DO IT? Well, for starters, more and more women are amenable to the idea, and these days some realize that it is such a common practice that their partners are going to expect it as a right. If you aren’t sure, don’t beat about the bush – get straight to the point. Ask her. Sex is such an integral part of any relationship that you have to get exactly what you want (and that’s mutual, by the way: if you don’t give her what she wants in bed, you’re in trouble too) or you are going to stray sooner or later, no doubt about it.
Anal sex encompasses more than just sticking your penis into someone’s anus, although that is the holy grail. The menu includes finger probing, or just rubbing the anus; annilingus (licking the anus, or even inserting the tongue); probing with toys or other objects (fruit & vegetables etc), and, finally, what the old-timers call sodomy. Whatever you call it, it feels great. Does it feel great for the woman, though? If done hurriedly, roughly or without the right preparation, definitely – it can hurt her immensely. And if you ruin it the first time, she’ll never want to do it again. So get it right the first time.
So, before we start anything, we need some lubrication. People argue over what is best, most hygienic etc, but the most important thing to remember is any lube is better than no lube. There’s a movie starring Victoria Givens where she takes on about 100 or more men in an anal gang-bang, and on the cover and it claims she didn’t use any lube. For mere mortals, this is not recommended! Good old Vaseline is the best for anal sex, followed by oil-based lube and then water-based lube. Vaseline retains its viscosity, whereas the weaker stuff can be absorbed too quickly into the skin, which means you have to stop and reapply – this can really ruin the moment.
The following is all important for an enjoyable anal experience for all. Firstly, let’s imagine enemas aren’t part of the equation, as this is a rare practice in reality. Just make sure that your partner has had a decent bowel movement at least an hour before engaging in anal activity. A pre-sodomy shower is also ideal, as it makes the first step easier. When you have your partner in the mood (preferably after some ordinary vaginal intercourse to get her nice and randy – if she climaxes beforehand – even better), flip her on her tummy and start licking gently around her anus. Pressing you tongue flat over the whole hole (pardon the pun) and pushing can give her some delightful sensations. She may prefer light flicking tongue movements, or even deeper probing into her anus. Experiment, listen for her groans, and go with the moment.
Next, insert a finger, which you have lubed up prior. Do this nice and slow – in and out to the first knuckle, then to the second. If possible, reach around and stimulate her clit at the same time. If the first finger poking goes okay, slip in a second finger. If this proves difficult, slow down and go back to the one finger. When she starts pushing back against your fingers, this is the signal to get out the big boy.
Lube your penis and her anus again until really slippery. Ask her to hold her butt cheeks apart (she can be on her knees, or even on her back with a pillow under the lower back). Gently place your glans against the forbidden entrance and ask her to push back very slowly. DO NOT rush this. Her natural reaction is not to allow your penis in there, but persist. If she can relax to the maximum degree, your job is going to be much easier. Once you get the head of your penis inside, leave it there for a while – no motion. Then gently push in an inch or two, then out again. Gradually build up until she is taking the maximum possible. If you’re not the owner of a massive member, you might be lucky to get the whole lot in there! When you are finished, pull your tool out slowly. It’s often a good idea to keep some baby wipes or similar handy – just in case. Have a shower (with your woman, of course) as soon as possible, as there may be some evil bacteria lurking about.
Finally, and this is very important if you aren’t in a stable, monogamous relationship – wear a condom for goodness sake! Everyone these days is aware of the dangers of AIDS; besides, there are other infections you may pick up, especially if you have a tear or abrasion.
So, go ahead and enjoy the pleasures of anal sex, which is no longer a taboo in a free and modern society. Just be patient, considerate and observe the basics of hygiene, and you and your partner will be engaging in butt play more often. Oh yeah, guys. If you want to know what she’s going through, swap roles and she can do you with a strap-on. You just might enjoy it!